In trying to reset, refocus, and refocus, I decided a visit to the beach was necessary to discover what I currently like by examining my actions.
One reason I think I want to live in Southern California is because of the easy beach access. I think I love playing in the waves and have often expressed the desire to learn how to surf. Except if I truly loved playing in the waves then why don’t my actions match my words?
The closest unpolluted beach nearby (Jones Beach) is about a 4-hour roundtrip drive and my last visit was around 5 years ago. That’s why I decided a visit to the beach was necessary to understand how much I actually love playing in the waves versus how much I think I love it.
There Was a Lot of Friction Because
- I don’t like to spend more than 2 hours in a car on any given day.
- I don’t like wearing a swimsuit.
- I don’t enjoy sunbathing but felt compelled to do so because I’ve been conditioned to think I’m supposed to love it.
- I don’t enjoy reapplying sunblock in the heat while I’m actively sweating.
- Neither Mark nor my friends enjoy going to the beach.
How I Overcame the Friction
- I asked myself if my anticipation of the amount of enjoyment I get from playing in the waves would offset my discomfort from the 4-hour round trip to and from the beach. I think playing in the waves is a 5-star activity for me, and 4-hour drive roundtrip is a 2-star activity, which would make a visit to the beach a 3.5-star activity. This helped convince me to go.
- I didn’t wear a swimsuit. I wore activewear instead. On this visit, I decided that I was going to go no deeper than my knees to play in the waves.
- I decided to skip laying in the sand altogether. Instead, I spent it playing in the waves.
- I set 2 hours as the maximum amount of time to be spent at the beach.
- I offered to go out to eat with Mark (an activity I shy away from due to my binge eating disorder) in return for his accompanying me to the beach.
Jones Beach Visit Takeaways
- I love playing in the waves! It’s definitely a 5-star activity for me!
- I regret wearing activewear instead of a swimsuit. If I’d worn a swimsuit, I would have been able to fully play in the waves.
- I don’t miss laying in the sand at all.
- I think two hours is about the right time for me to spend playing in the waves.
- I didn’t enjoy eating out. Currently, I think I really only enjoy dining al fresco. However, Mark dislikes it as he prefers eating indoors.
After this visit to Jones Beach, I realized that I love playing in the waves. I’m going to visit the beach one more time in August and fully play in the waves. On my next trip to Southern California in 2023, I’m going to make it a priority to visit the beach and play in the waves 5 times.
I want my actions to mirror my feelings!
