In trying to reset, refocus, and refocus, I wanted to understand why some friends pursue an incredibly difficult goal.
This past June, Mark and I promised our friend Sere that we would go cheer her on as she swam around Manhattan aka the 20 Bridges Swim. On Saturday 8/13/2022, Mark and I were at Pier 17 waving madly and taking pictures. (FYI, Pier 17 was nearly completely empty before 10 am)
Did you know the 20 Bridges Swim is part of the famed Triple Crown of Open Water Swimming along with the English Channel and the Catalina Channel? Fascinating!
Watching Sere swim alongside a kayaker and kayak, and a support boat with a captain and two other people to support her, makes me realize the sheer amount of willpower, physical ability, and team effort necessary to complete this goal.
It also makes me think of my late father who swam across the Yangtze River with about 100 other people from his work unit in the 1970s. Swimming across the Yangtze River was made famous by Chairman Mao, and people who were able to complete the swim were given great recognition. I think my father deeply craved recognition.
My father told me that during the swim there were many times he thought he was never going to make it but forced himself to continue because would rather drown than not make it so he pushed on. Only 3 out of the 100 people from his work unit made it.
I start thinking if there was any time in my life that I wanted to accomplish something so badly that I would die for it. The answer is no. I’ve come to realize that for most of my life, I’ve been a follower and easily influenced.
Why did my life revolve around food for so many years? It was because of my late father. I don’t remember actually caring about food until I was punished by him for only wanting to eat roast duck over rice with napa cabbage all the time.
Why did I travel so much in the past? It was because my late father and my friends loved to travel. I don’t remember actually liking to travel until I got teased for being unadventurous and uncultured.
Why did I hang out in the South Street Seaport area so much in my high school years (I think I was there every other week for about two years even though I lived in Queens) when I wasn’t even particularly drawn to the area? It was because my friends thought the place was cool and I wanted to be cool too that I tagged along.
It’s disconcerting now for me to realize that I spent so much time following other people for most of my life.
Watching Sere swim, I knew she swam for herself and not for recognition. She doesn’t talk about swimming and mentioned the 20 Bridges Swim in passing. She was there to swim regardless of whether other people were impressed. I want to be like that too. To be brave enough to chart my own path because I like it. Even if doesn’t receive recognition.
